It was an unusual night.
The clouds were dead dark.
The moon was hiding
Behind the clouds out of fear.
The fear of loneliness.
It had only one best friend, cloud.
It eventually faded away by the wind.
The moon was contemplatin
About life in the blackout.
It don’t know that it was light by itself.
All it needed was someone
To acknowledge and identify it’s worth…
All of a sudden,out of blue,
The moon happened to see the sea.
It saw it’s image.
It was euphoric by seeing it’s reflection.
It witnessed that universe was pitch dark.
It was euphoric
Not because it saw it’s significance of existence,
Because it saw the earth
Which was helping out to see it’s beauty.
And then no longer moon felt lonely.
They became one.
I saw blood running through the grips of my hands, my teeth clapping with cold, and rain drops hammering onto my face as I rode through this endless path. I’ve been through worse I thought, only to know I haven’t.
My mind lost in thought, and my heart beating fast as I saw nothing but a storm waiting for me. I was trying to escape, but I couldn’t see what I was running away from. I was travelling these endless loops, not knowing when to stop, not knowing when to give up, only to feel darkness engulf my will.
I knew there was no going back from these roads, there is no going home, and there is only my light that is slowly and steadily loosing.
Moving from one side of the globe
Isn’t an easy thing to do
But I still did it.
Running away from my problems
Didn’t gave me solution
But I still ran away.
Leaving back the people
Who were there from the beginning
Isn’t a right thing to do
But I still left them
Saying I don’t care
When I care the most
Isn’t a right thing to say
But I still said it.
Sun sets on another day,
There hasn’t been much work,
Seeds remain seeds,
Stomachs remain the same,
Begging on streets,
Shame, what shame?
Ropes cost less,
Vomit, not blood, makes more mess;
Kids don’t move,
Nothing to fret;
No rain tomorrow,
Nothing to wash away the sorrow,
So why cope,
I take the rope;
Adding a couple of months of life,
For my dearest wife,
Since my death shall say,
And the policy will pay.
And I, finally in peace I lay.
The oceans knew who my ancestors were
The trees knew what they ate
The land knew how they evolved
The wind knew where they traveled
The skies knew what they benefited
The nights knew what they suffered
Yes, they know all about us too, but,
With our progeny and those of theirs
They refused to share
all the knowledge and wisdom.
When I asked, Why oh Why?
The tides rose high
The trees waved with a sigh
The land shook in rage
The wind spiralled and lift the dust
The skies burst out loud
The nights became darker than ever
‘Why oh Why’ my voice quivered
‘We hid in us the secrets of creation
Revealing to you little by little.
We saved with us the truths of creation
Which you unlocked and evolved, little by little.
Our blessings which we bestowed upon you
Were taken for granted for once and always.
Therefore, dear man, we condemn
The destruction, caused by you to us.
You refused to protect us
We cause you despair through knock-backs.
Soon, we all will be gone and
So will be your memories we hid with us
We will perish with time and
So will your greeds and you’ they reverberated
Feeling the minute changes in ourselves at one end and being uncomfortable with it at the other end;
Applying resilience on the mind after pounding, pummeling and bombarding it with inane thoughts at one end and realizing that so far what made us good may or may not be able to do so in future at the other end;
Never culminating, never continuing;
Never questioning and never answering;
At the end, never even living;
If this is what the maturity is all about then I want to be immature once again.
I want to be a toddler who never cared about dust;
I want to be a young who never had known the venery;
I want to be an adolescent who indulged in grabbing attention with ardent love;
I want to be educated once again and be immensely pompous for knowing what all or some of us knew already;
And finally, I want to be a mature adult to realize how immature I was to do all of them.
Knotted cherry stem words,
Leave my mouth now,
I can’t hold on to the tied syllables anymore.
Sweet rotting fruit basket of thoughts, you, in my head,
Decay and die, you are more toxic
Than the drug I take to hallucinate.
Warmth in the cold, fear in the dark, you…
How do I escape?
Solitude is not my paternal land I can embrace.
Oh, you deadly silences,
You past midnight, close to dawn
Yet so far from my sweet sleep,
Special ingredient to my brewing thoughts.
“Does everything last forever?”
How much of everything can I hold?
I hold the universe in me, some say.
I’m a system of my own.
This unlike the man-made is still breaking,
In each tick, in every tock.
Blood gushing to my heart, beats 1-2-3-4,
Thoughts racing, now beats 1-2-3-4 all at once.
So tell me? Everything?
What is this? This 10 letter word is a spell,
It can hold so many undefined entities.
Broken relationships, compromised relationships, deceitful love?
Broken dreams, failed promises, lost poetry?
Is forever a spectrum?
This forever in your sweet fairytale,
Turned rock into sand.
Romanticised youth to kill you at 75 or younger.
Oh, you sweet Forever you only bring
The clichéd love alive in their minds,
All sweet things I loathe.
Just like my self-pity, I fall prey to.
Just like the foolish moth drawn to a flame.
Oh you sweet Forever,
Can you kill my fear, like you kill men?
Can you bury my insecurities,
Just like Shakespeare, Wordsworth
And all other dead poets?
Can you burn my thoughts to ashes?
Forever and Everything, my pretty muse,
A vortex I created with you,
I don’t know how,
A labyrinth I built out of you,
You’ve made me the creator
Of my own personalised catastrophe.
-Swathy Narayani S.